Wednesday, May 26, 2010

100 Facts About Me - Installment 4

61. John viciously lies about me when he says I snore.

62. I have a Simmons Beautyrest mattress that is less than a year old for which I paid nearly $1,200 (for the mattress only - can you say "highway robbery") and I am no more beautiful or rested than I was before. Actually, if the truth be told, I am much more sore, tired, and ugly. I should sue. They could admit my whole body as evidence in such a court case.

63. I love to swim - or just walk around in the water. Doesn't that count as swimming?

64. I miss our old pool. We don't have one at our new house.

65. We do have a pond in our yard though. But I would prefer not to get covered in leeches or eaten by a giant snapping turtle. So swimming at home is out of the question.

66. Once on a Sunday afternoon with some friends from church I swam the width of Bledsoe's Creek at a fairly wide spot because I didn't want to look like a scared little school girl. I was in my early to mid teens at the time. Only made it 3/4 of the way across before a rescue was needed. To get me back across they floated this scared little school girl on a log. Don't think I ever told my parents about that one. I guess they know now.

67. As a general rule I do not allow my daughter to go on picnics with friends near a body of water larger than a bird bath.

68. As a child I had a recurring nightmare of falling through the hay drop in the upper level of my pa's barn and being trampled by the cows. I attribute this to my love of red meat today.

69. I was known to sleepwalk at times growing up. I remember doing this twice. Once waking up at the very back of our yard next to the woods and the other time on the kitchen trash can, undies around my ankles. Take a guess.

70. I am distantly related to Howard Hughes - or at least my mother and about half the residents of Westmoreland were told this in the late 70s. Still waiting on that inheritance.

71. Somehow managed to catch my veil on fire at my wedding while lighting the unity candle. On the wedding video you can see me reach up and put my hand around the veil, followed by a little trail of rising smoke.

72. During the first few nights we were married John and I stayed at the Hermitage Hotel in Nashville. Yep, Nashville. Yes, the one in Tennessee, all of 50 miles from our hometown. Please - try not to be jealous.

73. The Sunday afternoon following our wedding - less than 24 hours after our wedding - John's family showed up at the hotel to visit us ON OUR HONEYMOON!

74. During some down time on this epic adventure of a honeymoon struck up a conversation with a nice old man who lived in the hotel who went by the name Minnesota Fats.

75. My only other brushes with fame have been when my father worked for a while as one of Conway Twitty's contractors in the early 80s and seeing Reba McEntire at O'Charley's in Gallatin on two occasions.

76. My mother once took pictures of my teenage bedroom and threatened to submit them to the local paper for publication if I didn't clean it up.

77. I became lost in the bowels of the Cannon House Office Building in Washington, D.C. the day of Clinton's inauguration when I left a reception for Tennesseans, in search of the office's cafeteria for better food.

78. In my youth and naivety I asked a couple from Spring Hill whom I had just met to watch our camcorder while I went on this journey.

79. The aforementioned recording device belonged to John's school. He, as a history teacher, had borrowed it to record some inaugural events.

80. Almost two hours later when I finally found my way back to the reception area this same couple from Spring Hill was still there - even though the reception was loonngg over. Aren't Tennesseans the nicest people? Though they probably spoke a few choice words about me during the time I was gone and in years since refer back to it as, "You remember the time that stupid girl left us holding her camcorder while she went to stuff her face and we missed seeing the president in the parade?"


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

girl u still crazy...remember the mj days

Tyla said...

I surely do. LOL