It's Hard Letting Go.

I well remember that first night after John and I brought our newborn daughter home from the hospital. Due to a rather large, rather uncomfortable incision across my lower abdomen I chose to "sleep" sitting on the sofa rather than stretch out (ouch) in my bed. Ren slept in her lace-covered bassinet, which was positioned just as close to me as possible. When that wasn't close enough, I took her out of her bed and made a nice nest for her on a pillow in my lap. I spent the entire night just watching her - making sure she was still breathing, safe. It was all I could do to keep my eyes open and I wondered if I would ever sleep worry-free again.

Those sleepless nights on the couch lasted for several days and I longed for the time when I would be able to lay down in my own bed and actually sleep.

Fast forward 15 years. The worry-free nights are about to be taken to a whole new level. Ren now has her driving permit. Even though she turned 15 in September, she wasn't really interested in getting her permit until recently - which was fine with her father and me. But now, the countdown is on for that day when she will have an official license and be on the road by herself, and I find myself wishing I could somehow turn back time - and have her nestled on a pillow in my lap again.