Monday, August 1, 2011

Setting a Little Something on Your Shelf

Just when I feel life has become a little unblogworthy (yeah, I know that’s not a real word but neither was Google a few years ago) something always seems to happen that makes me want to take pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard, and record it for posterity.

According to many polls, one of the perks enjoyed by pregnant women is the enhancement of cleavage. Well, I don’t know who they canvassed for such a vote but it surely had to be only women who enjoyed the benefits of temporary endowments. I just can’t see women who are already blessed in that area being particularly thrilled with more. Why? Well, I could site just how disadvantageous it is to a woman’s health but there’s another area of equal concern. A woman’s wardrobe.

A good friend of mine, we’ll call her Twyla because she’s been known to pass as my twin, happens to have this problem. Not a shirt in her closet has made it through a meal without coming home with a souvenir. Poor girl always manages to drop something... soup, salad dressing, ketchup - she even managed once to land a whole fried apple slice smack dab in the middle of her shirt while at the Cracker Barrel. Her daughter thought the entire episode was quite hilarious. Twyla was just thankful she wasn’t wearing a v-neck.

Anyway, lo and behold today, at the local meat and 3, what does my friend do? She goes and decorates the front of her favorite t-shirt with a stewed tomato. I know. I was there. Others were witness to this as well, including one longtime friend of the family at another table who let my friend know she suffers from the same and, often, can’t eat without setting a little something on her own shelf.

Well, I need to head on to bed. Tomorrow’s my last day of summer vacation and I promised John-Heath I would take him to see The Smurfs. But first, I have a little laundry to do.

Oh, and if you have never had macaroni and tomatoes you just don't know what you're missing. They're as yummy as they are messy (to some)!

P.H., this one was for you ;)


Carrot Jello said...

My twin does the same thing. She's so embarrassing.

Tina said...

ha ha...that is sooo me! I have so many shirts with stains on them! The worst is when crumbs fall down in the cleavage..that's a horrible feeling..and nothing I can do to fix when in a crowd!